~Little Voices~

Monday, July 30, 2012

水銀燈



動畫《ローゼンメイデン(薔薇少女/Rozen Maiden)》中的一個角色。
名称:水銀燈(すいぎんとう),Mercury Lampe。
自視甚高,個性殘忍孤傲,對其他人偶並不看在眼裡,總以「笨蛋」(おバカさん)稱呼她們,但對於「垃圾」一詞非常反感。
主要的武器也是最大的特徵是背部的黑色翅膀,可以以上面的羽毛攻擊別人。同時也有與真紅類似的人偶操控能力。
造型是哥德蘿莉(ゴシック・アンド・ロリータ),服飾上有象徵其叛逆個性的反十字,由於造型跟聲優的關係,相當受歡迎。
 虽然我没有追看蔷薇少女,但是看到这个角色设计非常喜爱。神秘的蘿莉塔服饰、心高气傲,可是对主人带着感情,特殊能力。。。正是最能攻陷我的“女强"型。

*作画速度比以往慢了很多。本来想要学用paint tool SAI,可是最近我的老鼠越来越不听使唤了。这是我首次在画中加入颜色,之前都只是单纯的黑铅笔shading。 原画带着捉摸不透的神情,却给我画成了轻蔑一笑。

Friday, July 20, 2012

雨夜

一滴滴   一滴滴
刺痛
冷飕飕
似那一夜无尽黑夜的降落

望着窗外   悠悠转转
仍没法参透
你离去时的淡漠


Sunday, July 1, 2012

压力

        虽然这个名词本就和芸芸众生脱不了干系,可对我而言,压力简直像个黑洞,把我整个卷入,然后无从求助,连一丝微弱的曙光都没有。 偏偏我又是个完美主义者,当其他人认为合格就好的时候,我还要得到笃定的认同。
        作为一名学生,我的压力无非来自于我的学业。很多人劝过我要看开,毕竟已经是大学生了,何苦和自己过不去,硬是和人比较?我也时常这样告诉自己,可是不知是因为阴影还是什么,总是踏上了尽力到自残的地步。就连小小的一个presentation、测验等等,我都如临大敌。连带的,每次和我同组的朋友们,真是辛苦他们了。
        不说之前的事了,就拿最近的例子吧!刚过去的六月使我入读药剂系第三年第二个学期的大考。还是study week 的时候,我的症状,毫无预警地就开始了。渐渐地,我每天早上一醒来就会呕吐,食不下咽,晚上还会发噩梦。甚至到第一张试卷的早上我居然吐胆汁。这期间,唯一的大幸恐怕只能说这次不必上次严重吧!等到考完第二天,我又莫名其妙地好了。
        为什么会搞到这步田地呢?因为我无法承受打开考卷,看到太多不会做或是没有把握的题目。很多人认为不会做,胡写一通不就得了,但我不行。(其实行的,哪只狗急了不会跳墙?)我并非天资聪颖。我不敢冒那个险,所以我宁愿自残也要确保拥有那102%的万全准备。
        不管怎样,一切已雨过天晴,只盼经过一场又一场的试炼后,我可以更从容面对人生的挑战。

Monday, March 26, 2012

Bella Noche

A beautiful night at Equatorial hotel with a shade of blue
 

a beautiful hall but the same day there is another function in the next hall, then a lot of businessmen came to the wrong room

My ex-roommate and I
Love this particular photo
My family in pharmacy school

Sunday, March 11, 2012

I wonder

New drawing after such a long long time.
my skills need more honing.

Friday, February 10, 2012

New Sem, New Attitude

It is around a month ago that I struggled in the final exam...
After the exam, I start to think about a lot of things:
I have always been too much of a careful planner, I planned too much, wishing to finish everything well before its time. It could have been very good as works can be finished earlier with more time for other activities. However, not all are suitable with my methods, sometimes I become so pushy because I can not stand having things not going according to plan. This hurts a lot of people that I am working with which are actually very capable in their own manner, just they did not fit the pace of mine. Somehow, I feel that I should be more lenient, let things flow as there are, doing last-minute work is also OK. Perhaps everyone will be less strained including myself.

I also have been too frank and harsh with people. Even when the person did make mistakes, I shouldn't have critic the person with no point of turning around. Sometimes, it is just unfair to compare people amongst each other, even though they share similar criteria but nobody's perfect. We may all start at the same point but we do not reach the finishing line at the same time.

At the night after finishing exam and time to go home, I was feeling emotional all of the sudden. Since most coursemates already went home, I went out to have dinner myself. While dining alone, the loneliness struck me down, thinking that after all the hustle and bustle, what else is left? Where are those old days? Where are the people I used to share my life with? Then I remembered Yen Kee, a friend who is now living in the heavens.The last time when I met her face-to-face is when we are getting the RM200 at KOMTAR after SPM. She was still healthy, cheerful and a sweet girl as always but then I never see her again. What about the others? What if I never see them again too?  Therefore as soon as I get back, I tried to make gatherings...as many as possible.

I guess, sometimes we all need a moment, a moment to think about all the things in our lives....