New Sem, New Attitude

It is around a month ago that I struggled in the final exam...

After the exam, I start to think about a lot of things:

I have always been too much of a careful planner, I planned too much, wishing to finish everything well before its time. It could have been very good as works can be finished earlier with more time for other activities. However, not all are suitable with my methods, sometimes I become so pushy because I can not stand having things not going according to plan. This hurts a lot of people that I am working with which are actually very capable in their own manner, just they did not fit the pace of mine. Somehow, I feel that I should be more lenient, let things flow as there are, doing last-minute work is also OK. Perhaps everyone will be less strained including myself.

I also have been too frank and harsh with people. Even when the person did make mistakes, I shouldn't have critic the person with no point of turning around. Sometimes, it is just unfair to compare people amongst each other, even though they share similar criteria but nobody's perfect. We may all start at the same point but we do not reach the finishing line at the same time.

At the night after finishing exam and time to go home, I was feeling emotional all of the sudden. Since most coursemates already went home, I went out to have dinner myself. While dining alone, the loneliness struck me down, thinking that after all the hustle and bustle, what else is left? Where are those old days? Where are the people I used to share my life with? Then I remembered Yen Kee, a friend who is now living in the heavens.The last time when I met her face-to-face is when we are getting the RM200 at KOMTAR after SPM. She was still healthy, cheerful and a sweet girl as always but then I never see her again. What about the others? What if I never see them again too?  Therefore as soon as I get back, I tried to make gatherings...as many as possible.

I guess, sometimes we all need a moment, a moment to think about all the things in our lives....